Fourth Thursday

So, a few months ago, Naia and I went in on a #yousuck topic. I was thinking back on that today and decided that I would make a "Suck Wall." This will be a list of things that frustrate the hell out of me.

Remember, I am a self-confessed asshole. If you're sensitive...you may want to turn around now.

Things that belong on the suck wall:

1) Greeks who spells shit with their greek letters. I understand that you have to have pride for your PHrAternity, but do you reAlly need to KApAtAlize every letter And replAce every phoneticAlly similar KhArActer to make me believe that you are part of your group? The stuff looks stupid, it's hard to read...and it took me 7 minutes to type that last sentence. Get out of here and stick to steppin.

2) Lord of the Rings fans. Yea, I said it. I can't stand those long, boring movies and books. They just never end. The movie is hard to follow and boring. The book is just filled with unnecessary details that distracts from the story...which is still hard to follow and boring. The fans, however, will call you stupid if you don't like it. Just because you read each book 5 times to understand it doesn't mean you're smart, jackass.

3) Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson. You put out that boo-boo Before I Self Destruct and Curtis. Why? Why do you hate your fans so much? No, I will not support your beefs. No, I will not keep ranting about how you were dope when Get Rich or Die Trying came out. You've lost your hip-hop edge. Congrats on the businesses...but maybe you should drop the title of rapper.

4) Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh. For obvious reasons.

5) Atheists who look for reasons to bash God. Y'all like to list ways that the church has ostracized people and ish but then bash God in the same manner. That's kind of hypocritical. I don't really care if you don't want to believe. Just don't bash my God to make yourself feel better.

6) Black women with hairy lips. Before the dogs come loose: I don't like white women with hairy lips either. The difference is that I can see them from a distance while with a black chick, you gotta be right up on them to see the multitude of straggly hairs accumulating around their mouth. That's deceptive. I will gasp and point at it.

7) Conspiracy Theorist. Sometimes y'all say some thought provoking mess...then mess it up with Satan and aliens.

8) Stores that should ALWAYS have something but always run out. St. Louis Bread Co., I'm talking to you. You are a BREAD CO. You should never run out of bagels or anything bread related. C'monson!

9) The Bold Ugly Friend. We all know these people. Someone's cute but they got the velociraptor with them. They, because of people like Oprah and Tyra telling them so, wholeheartedly believe they deserve attention like their much cuter friends. They will hate on any dude that talks to the friends and try to steal the spot light. I carry a tranquilizer gun for these creatures. Real talk.

10) Twitter Thugs and Twitter Hoes. Fellas, if you are on Twitter braggin about your stroke game, you have know stroke game. If you are talkin about all the people you bodied, you have never been in a fight. Women, all of you can't be models. Half of y'all look like Geodude from Pokemon. Stop it. Also, you are not a barbie. You'll need much more than 140 characters to make me believe otherwise.

That's my list for today. What's on your list?